When parents contemplate the possibility of dying prematurely or suffering a catastrophic illness, they are naturally concerned about what will happen to their children. Parents of disabled children are often especially concerned about the quality of their children’s lives should the parent become unable to provide needed care.
These concerns can be addressed by writing a Letter of Intent. This is a document in which parents include important information about their child’s history, personality, interests, care, development, needs and current situation. It also includes the parents’ hopes and expectations regarding the child’s future.
Although a Letter of Intent is not a legally binding document like a contract or a will, courts and future care providers will rely on it for guidance and insight into the needs of a child who can no longer be cared for by his or her parents. It serves as a voice on behalf of a child whose parents can no longer be that voice.
Writing a Letter of Intent can be a highly emotional experience. Sometimes parents forget that the Letter of Intent is ideally intended as a guide to others to help foster the child’s independence and growth into an independent adult. It is not a compromise document intended to accommodate the convenience of other relatives, nor is it a tool for controlling and restricting the child’s future life and choices. As such, it is advisable to have the child participate in the writing of the Letter to the extent possible.
What To Include
Parents should begin their Letter of Intent by stating their child’s full name, date and place of birth, and Social Security number. It should also include contact information for anyone who should be informed of any catastrophe that befalls the parents.
This list might include relatives and trusted friends. When mentioning relatives, it is useful to provide the child’s family history, including birthdates and any special attachments or relationships the child has developed with particular family members. Parents might also include contact information for lawyers, clergy, financial advisors, their respective employers’ human resources departments, local agencies that have records concerning the child’s situation and the child’s school. In the case of dependent adult disabled children, this list might also include the child’s employer.
Letters of Intent are then typically divided into sections that address any or all of the following areas:
- Financial and other supports
The financial supports section often includes information concerning government benefits received by the child and arrangements with a corporate guardianship or cooperative master trust program for the child’s care. This is also where one might include an adult child’s employment or the type of future employment the parent anticipates for a minor child. - Living arrangements
The living arrangement section often includes the parents’ recommendations for the child’s housing. Such recommendations often include the best location (example: in the town where child has spent his or her life,) type (example: with a particular relative,) and qualities (example: a nonsmoking home for a child with asthma) - Programs/services
The programs/services section often includes the type of school or educational program the child is or should be enrolled in, therapies or services the child needs, any necessary routine medical care, the child’s typical routine or schedule (example: what does the child need to do to get ready for school) - Personal preferences
The personal preferences section is where parents discuss in detail the child’s personality and activities. This section is where parents often discuss matters like the child’s food and clothes preferences, favorite personal items, his of her ability to handle particular chores and other responsibilities, favorite hobbies and religious preferences - Abilities
The abilities section is similar to the personal preferences section except that it focuses exclusively on the child’s level of independence and ability to handle various aspects of everyday life. This section often includes information on the child’s level of independence in getting around the community (can the child drive a car or take a city bus without supervision?) It also covers handling money skill and ability to make other decisions. This section might also focus on the child’s ability to communicate with others, and/or to read and understand written communications.
Once the Letter of Intent is finished, the parents should ask their attorney to review it. Although this is not legally binding, it should conform to the parents’ wills to avoid potential future probate problems. A Letter of Intent should also be updated periodically to reflect changes in the child’s situation.
A Letter of Intent can help alleviate the concerns of parents who are worried about how their child will be cared for in the event of their death or catastrophic illness.
By: Brett A. Kaufman, Esquire
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